Hitting Home: Mastering
One-on-One Communication
(May 2009)
To get your point across, aim to reach others on an emotional level.
Whether you want a customer to
buy your product, a coworker to
support your great idea, or your boss
to give you a raise, there’s a surefire
method to improve the chance the
other person will respond in your
favor.
Getting the result you intend is all
about communicating effectively—a
skill too often neglected, according to
David Bartlett, author of Making Your
Point: Communicating Effectively with
Audiences of One to One Million.
“Nearly everyone takes communication
for granted,” Bartlett
explains. “You may assume if you
say something clearly and succinctly,
the other person will automatically
listen to you, understand what you
say, accept your point of view, and
do what you want. But that’s not how
human beings usually respond.”
Being Heard, Step by Step
Think of how many e-mails, phone
calls, text messages, memos, news
stories, conversations, or other communications
come your way each day.
If you didn’t filter out the irrelevant
messages, you’d be mired in information.
It’s the same for everyone else.
You need to ensure your message
is heard above all the noise—and not
only heard, but believed, remembered,
and acted on. To help this happen,
Bartlett suggests these strategies.
- Know your strategic objective.
Are you trying to get the other person
to do something? To stop doing
something? To believe in something?
It’s better to know your objective
from the outset.
“You have to be keenly focused on
what the message is and why you’re
seeking to deliver it,” says Bartlett.
- Know your target audience.
Communicating effectively is always
less about you than it is about the
people you’re trying to reach, Bartlett
insists. Try to get a sense of their
needs and interests, and of how they
tend to process information.
- Understand their specific
concerns. What makes others tick
on an emotional level? You may think
the facts speak for themselves, but
people’s emotions surrounding a
given issue nearly always outweigh
the facts alone.
“If you can’t get in touch with
what others care about, you’ve lost
them before you’ve started,” says
Bartlett. “What scares them? What
makes them mad? What makes them
happy? That’s where people really
live, and where communication
succeeds or fails.”
- Plan how you’ll respond to
concerns. Anticipate the four or
five broad categories of concerns or
questions the other person is likely
to bring up, and plan a solid, proactive
response based on your strategic
objective. If there are questions
you should avoid, plan to do so while
maintaining your credibility.
- Know your one key message.
“Getting one key point across is as
important a rule for effective communication
as anything else,” Bartlett
stresses. “People are only going to
remember one thing you say, whether
you talk for five minutes or five
hours. So it’s up to you to say the
right thing.”
- Get to the point right away.
If you deliver all your supporting
evidence before stating your key
message, people’s attention may
wander, or they may come to
their own separate conclusions.
Quickly and clearly make your
point so they appreciate why it’s
important to keep listening. By
the time you get to the supportive
details, they’ll know what they
mean and why they matter.
The Key Message
If you remember just one word,
Bartlett suggests, make it emotion.
“That’s what effective communication
is all about,” he says. “Think of
your strategic objective, what the
other person is trying to get out of
it, and how you can give the other
person what he or she wants. If you
can do that, you’ve communicated
effectively.”
Polly Turner spoke with David Bartlett,
senior vice president of Levick Strategic
Communications in Washington, D.C., and
author of Making Your Point: Communicating
Effectively with Audiences of One to One
Million, St. Martin’s Press, 2008, $24.95.
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